A friend that sticks closer than a brother

 

Someone once said family isn’t always blood,it’s the people in your life who want you in theirs and accepts you. Many of us desire people around us—not necessarily a crowd, but those who are dear to us, who will call us out on our crap, and who genuinely cares. I was once in those shoes, searching for such people.

As an introvert, I only talked when I was around people I could relate to. I often had a straight face when alone, which made it difficult for strangers to approach me. The only people I could relate to were my friends from secondary school. If you took them from me, I had no social life. I was determined to keep in touch with everyone to avoid loneliness, but my efforts were futile. After secondary school, we parted ways because of university and eventually lost touch with most of them(everyone got busy with life, but we still need our personal people right?). I didn't feel it at first because I had someone I talked to every day.

My mum(a  lecturer in my school) noticed my pattern of being alone and was always concerned. I couldn't blame her because she valued friendship (I now understand why she has a plug for everything). Her concerns seemed funny at the time, but one day she said“He that has friends must show himself friendly.” She had been observing my face outside (she didn’t know I used to frown as I spent my formative years in school). I made excuses, saying “the environment is different from where I used to be,” but she said one day, “Pray about it- the friends you want ” I didn't start praying until the end of that year, after I fell out with the person I used to talk to.

“To thy own self be true.” This is the first step to making a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Acknowledge that you want friendship and be ready to reciprocate. I always wished for people I could laugh with, take unaware pictures of, and share funny moments with( all those cute friends fthing sha) but I felt building those kinds of friendships would only happen if I lived in a hostel (I was going to school from home). I wanted it but tried to talk myself out of it.

Making yourself friendly is another way to make friends. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have boundaries, but Sis, you know this girl looks good today, make a compliment! Don’t sit in a gathering without talking to the person next to you. (Adeola, this includes you).

Thirdly, pray about friendships. I saw the manifestation of my prayers after I started praying for them. No prayer is too small for God; He knows you need covering . Pray for friends before you meet them. Tell God the kind of friendships you hope for, whether you want them to become like family. Speak to Him about it.

You can also read books to help your mindset on friendship. I recommend “Building Forever Friendships” by Jegede Adetoun and “Find Your People” by Jennie Allen.

Have friends so you can have plugs too😃

#friendshipseries1

                                                                                                                   ~Leyewrites🦋😚